DUI in Maine

I got this picture in an email and cracked up…it could work for a couple places…

How to tell if a Mainer has a DUI conviction

Whither Thou Goest

She stood,

a bride—

no bridegroom

but a still small voice…

“whither thou goest”

.

With God?

no one to

lean on but

a stumbling carpenter

who needed a

vision for his faith…

“whither Thou goest”

.

Who, God?

She birthed a

King—

a kingdom of golden hay,

the perfume of the stables,

the wrappings of silken burlap…

“whither Thou goest”

.

Where, God?

To Jerusalem for

three days

in His Father’s house;

With God

to Cana

drinking wine…

“whither Thou goest”

.

How far, God?

To the cross?

seeing God,

the King,

exalted

on a throne

of rough wood;

the Bridge

between

the bride

and her

God…

“whither Thou goest”

.

Even so

Come my

Kinsman-Redeemer,

my Son,

my Bridegroom,

.

my

God…

.

“whither Thou goest”

For Redmond

A poem written in college about my youngest piano student.  Hopefully the sentiment is not true anymore, given the last election results; over a year ago, now!

My little piano student

used to play on black keys;

now he uses them

only to name the white ones.

.

Any song using black

is “hard” now—

.

He doesn’t know yet

his face can’t always go

where mine could—

.

He only knows

once you’ve

passed the “baby” songs

it’s hard

to reach black

from

white,

.

and tension

separates

harmony

from reality.

Lots of deep thoughts

I couldn’t sleep last night.  I was upset because of the book (see previous post) I’d read, and thinking about that set me off on another whole train of thought, complete with three different songs in my head, lists of things I needed to do, remember, and think about today.  Writing them down, taking a hot shower, and drinking warm milk didn’t seem to help, so I finally got up to write some more.  It was about 5 AM anyway, although I didn’t have my church job today and wouldn’t have had to get up early.  Sigh.

Part of why I was up, though, was because of talking to a friend online about the book I’d read, and she mentioned a book that is changing her life while she’s spending time figuring out what she’s supposed to be doing with her life.  I’m sort of doing the same, although I have a definite goal I’m working toward in this time off from teaching.  But talking to her and reading that book kind of coalesced some questions I’ve been tossing around in my heard for a while.  No answers, just questions.

I’ve been wondering over the last couple-three years if I should be teaching high school, or even teaching at all.  And now, taking time off for a masters — in teaching — I’m still wondering.  I’m not a nice person when I teach.  At least, I haven’t been these last two years, and increasingly so.  In fact, I felt like I was approaching burnout.  I’m enjoying doing Pampered Chef, though, and I know why.  I don’t have to deal with people who don’t want to hear what I have to say, for the most part, and I’m not going to poor places, for the most part.  I can talk about the causes PC supports, but I don’t have to “get my hands dirty” or wear myself out supporting them directly.  In other words, it’s all very sterile when it comes to dealing with poverty.  At the same time, it is a business unlike other similar ones in that it does try to help people in several aspects of their lives, and I think it’s making a worthwhile effort.  But is it enough for a Christian?  Now we get to the whole crux of the matter.

A lot of my reluctance to turn my life fully over to Christ is because I don’t want to be invoncenienced.  I don’t want to give up anything.  I wasnt to read what I want, do what I want, spend my time how I want, and not “get my hands dirty” witnessing or living in hardship.  I know our money’s tight now, but when I read Paul and Petra’s blog I know we have a lot.  We talk about going overseas, but it’s to live there for the experience and the travel, not because we have a sense of mission.  I don’t even want to move out of my comfort zone here.  One of our church members was talking yesterday about how she tries to witness to everyone they work for, and how some people don’t call them back because they get offended.  I don’t have the faith to “jeopardize” my businesses enough to witness.  Probably the greatest insult one can give a true Christian is to say they’re not offending anyone.  Jesus offended people right and left; it’s why He was crucified!  And not only do I not have enough faith to risk my business, I don’t even have enough faith to give offerings!  We pay tithe (now), but another 10% on top of that?!?

It’s not just my Christian life, though — it’s my job too.  I want to go teach if I don’t have to go where people are poor and hate my guts because I’m the wrong color, but I get so upset over the treatment of anonymous people 250 years ago that I cry and can’t sleep.

Again, talk is cheap and doesn’t get my hands dirty.  Helping poor people is great, as long as it doesn’t cost me anything but lip service and a little time — freerice is an excellent example.

It all boils down to the fact that I’m inherently selfish.  I want to do the right thing, as long as it doesn’t hinder me from doing what I want or inconvenience me in any way.  That’s what someone else was saying yesterday at church — she realized she loves no one better than herself.  Not even God.  God help me!

So what do I do with my life?  Obviously I’m not going to figure it out today.

I can do Pampered Chef, teach in a good school, design quilts and sell them, or be a full-time piano teacher — all good and “non-dirty” jobs.  I can get my hands dirty — go as a missionary, teach in another inner-city school (God forbid!), witness to those around me.  Or I could do a combination of all of the above, at different times.

I really don’t know.  And I didn’t even factor being a parent in there, but that may be a topic for another late night.  In the distant future!

A Respectable Trade

I just finished reading Philippa Gregory’s A Respectable Trade and I’m feeling very sober.

The story, in brief, is about a Yoruban man, high in the government, who is out on a diplomatic mission and taken as a slave to England, where he is taught English by his owner’s wife in order to be resold as a house slave.  He and the wife fall in love and she has a child but dies in childbirth.  That’s the story in a nutshell.

I guess what makes it so poignant for me is that I never knew there were so many African slaves in England.  I mean, I knew that England outlawed slavery and the slave trade before America did, so it stood to reason that there were some, but according to the book, there was at least “one black face in every village in England”.  Reading other books about England’s history, I never got the sense that there were black people there at all.  I mean, I’ve read Shakespeare’s Othello, but it’s written about a Moor, who I always assumed was a North African, maybe a tradesman.  But I didn’t know there were so many slaves and freedmen in England.  I didn’t know that so many black people had lived and grieved and died in a place I thought was more open-minded than my own country has been.

I don’t know why it matters that I didn’t know.  It all happened a long time ago and there’s nothing I can do to change it now.  I don’t even live in England.  For that matter, when I told Kent about it, he said there were slaves in Europe as well, which I didn’t know.  I’m trying to figure out why I’m upset about it, why it matters to me that people I didn’t know were slaves in a place to which I’ve never been, in a time three centuries ago.  I know that there were slaves in America and that we’ve done quite badly by those from Africa, as well as those who owned this land before whites ever set foot on it.  I guess I thought it was our problem alone, that it hadn’t infected the rest of the world so insidiously.

I guess I thought England and the rest of the world had kept their hands clean, or mostly so.  I guess it couldn’t have been, because the whole world got rum and sugar from the Caribbean.  When there was a sugar tax that the American colonists boycotted, they were also boycotting the slave trade, but that wasn’t why they did it; it didn’t even enter into their calculations.  But I thought that slavery in England was a short-lived, small thing.

It wasn’t.

And I guess I’m upset because there’s one more thing that can’t be put right.  There’s been people conquering and conquered as long as there’s been history, but never on such a continental scale, for so many years.

There’s no way to fix what the white people have done.  We can’t give the land back to the Native Americans.  We can’t put Africa back the way it was.  It’s like an egg that’s been broken.  All we can do is get the best out of it we can and move on, but if there’s any “best” left, I don’t know.

I can’t change history by regretting it.  I don’t know what I can change.  It’s arrogant to think I can change anything.

I guess I can only go on as I have been doing, but with a larger reason:

To support those in the world who have less than I in so many ways,

To teach my students of all colors that they are the same people underneath,

To change one thought, one idea, one action, one person, one life at a time.

.

Starting with mine.

All right! I’ll do it!

I’ve been lectured most of the day today about how I need to quit the negative self-talk and focus on the positive about myself.  Patience just left and she made me promise to list ten positive things every day, and for one of them to be about myself.  So I’m making a new tab and I’ll list them every day like she said to do…good little me.    But I want to change more than that.  Watch this space. 

Blog Action Day 2009 — Why I’m a Vegetarian

A lot of people are worried about fossil fuel consumption and energy-efficient thises and thats.  Not enough people, in my opinion, and not enough lifestyle changes.  Unfortunately for most people I know who buy free-trade, organically-grown limited-processing food, they are wasting their time trying to save the planet if they are not vegetarians.

Raising beef for food takes many times the amount of energy, water, and land that raising grain for food takes.  Here are some charts from MichaelBlueJay’s site that show at a glance the differences.

Calories of fossil fuel used to make 1 calorie of protein for various foods

Gallons of water required to produce one pound of various foods

Number of people whose caloric needs can be met on 2.5 acres of land for the following foods

Ok, so what?  Resources are limited, as we all are being told all the time.  Why suck up more than your fair share eating meat (which is unhealthy as well) when many people in the world are starving?  We have a responsibility to the current population of the planet, as well as to future generations.  If eating less or no meat will help hoard our precious resources, then why not cut back or go vegetarian?  It will definitely make a difference and may change your life!

Sources and Resources

Books

Diet for a Small Planet – Frances Moore Lappe

Diet for a New America – John Robbins

Beyond Beef: The Rise and Fall of the Cattle Culture – Jeremy Rifkin

Mad Cowboy: Plain Truth from the Cattle Rancher Who Won’t Eat Meat – Howard F. Lyman

Websites and Web Articles

http://michaelbluejay.com/veg/environment.html

http://www.naturalnews.com/022402_beef_the_environment_emissions.html

http://bicycleuniverse.info/transpo/energy.html

http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1839995,00.html

http://pubs.acs.org/doi/abs/10.1021/es702969f

http://afp.google.com/article/ALeqM5iIVBkZpOUA9Hz3Xc2u-61mDlrw0Q

http://tierneylab.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/02/25/how-virtuous-is-ed-begley-jr/?apage=4#comment-11770

http://www.ajcn.org/cgi/content/full/78/3/660S#T1

http://www.spiegel.de/international/germany/0,1518,574754,00.html

http://www.fromthewilderness.com/free/ww3/100303_eating_oil.html

http://www.independent.co.uk/environment/climate-change/cow-emissions-more-damaging-to-planet-than-cosub2sub-from-cars-427843.html

http://www.organicconsumers.org/btc/fossilfuel060326.cfm

I have a complaint…

no, really!

Anything wrong with this picture?

How about this one?

No?

How about this??

Yes, that’s right.  It snowed all day yesterday — at least an inch, if not more — and the leaves are still GREEN!  What is going on??  I think I’ve missed fall!  Shouldn’t have taken that nap on Sunday afternoon!

Nectarine Galette

Well, peach, actually.  I still have some of those yummy peaches, all cut up and waiting to be loved.  So, since Smitten Kitchen’s Nectarine Galette has me hyperventilating, I thought I’d give it a try.

I mixed up the dough and let it chill in the fridge (yes, while the Artisan Bread dough was rising on the table.  I multitask all the time!).

I rolled out the dough on my new silicone mat (small plug for Pampered Chef) and transferred it to a baking sheet to cool again.

It was a little large for the sheet pan, but we managed nicely (the dough and I, that is).

After it cooled the second time, I put ground almonds, sugar, and peaches in the center, turned the edges over the fruit, and baked it nicely.

It didn’t make it more than a couple of hours, between Kent and me!

But the apple butter I had in my CrockPot at the same time is still in the freezer for Christmas presents

It looks a little scary, but it’s REALLY GOOD!

Author’s Note: This post was written September 10 and sat languishing, waiting for photos to be uploaded.  The galette is long gone.

In Memory

Copyright September 2001